For most Muslims, Ramadan is a month of fasting, abstinence from everything considered 鈥溾, and increased devotion. But for single Muslims, it can also be a month of deep longing 鈥 whether for companionship, emotional intimacy, or simply someone to share and with. While married couples enjoy the privilege of breaking their fast together, praying side by side, and even indulging in halal intimacy after iftar, singles often experience the opposite: solitude, temptation, and, in some cases, an overwhelming sense of loneliness.
We spoke to seven Nigerian muslims about what it feels like to navigate Ramadan alone.
“Ramadan makes my sexual urges feel tripled”
Ramadan is a time for spiritual cleansing, but for some single Muslims, it鈥檚 also a time when their physical desires become harder to ignore. For *Faruq, 25, resisting temptation becomes an even bigger challenge during this period.
“I don鈥檛 know what it is, but during Ramadan, my sexual urges go into overdrive. Maybe it鈥檚 because I know I shouldn鈥檛 be thinking about it, or maybe it鈥檚 just the test of discipline that comes with the holy month. But wallahi, it鈥檚 like my body is actively fighting my mind.
I try to stay focused 鈥 fasting, praying, avoiding triggers 鈥 but the thoughts still creep in. And the worst part? I鈥檓 not even married, so there鈥檚 no halal outlet for these desires. Some days, I find myself wishing I already had a wife because at least, marital intimacy is allowed after iftar. I won鈥檛 lie, I鈥檝e slipped a few times. I鈥檓 not proud of it, but self-pleasure sometimes feels like the only way to keep my head straight. And then I feel guilty after, questioning if my fast is even valid. The cycle of restraint, struggle, and guilt is exhausting, but I鈥檓 doing my best. May Allah make it easy for all of us.”
鈥淚 don鈥檛 even have someone to remind me it鈥檚 time for sahur鈥
*Amina鈥檚, 27, biggest struggle isn鈥檛 loneliness; it鈥檚 waking up on time.
“Sahur is always a struggle for me because I sleep like a log of wood. When I was in a relationship, my ex would call or text to wake me up, but now, nobody is checking for me. I鈥檝e missed sahur so many times that I鈥檝e started setting three alarms and keeping my phone volume at the loudest just so I don鈥檛 oversleep. It鈥檚 making me realise that small things like this are why having a partner makes life easier. Who knew I鈥檇 miss something as simple as a 4 a.m. wake-up call?”
鈥淏eing around family helps, but the backhanded comments? Whew鈥
*Hafsat, 31, enjoys being with her family during the holy month, but they come with a side of unsolicited commentary.
“I won鈥檛 lie, I鈥檓 grateful for my family. If I lived alone, I鈥檇 probably fall into depression during Ramadan. My mum makes sure I never miss sahur, my siblings keep me entertained, and iftar is always a full house with food that slaps. But the moment I sit down to eat, someone must mention marriage. I try to laugh it off, but sometimes, the comments really hit home. I know they mean well, but can I eat my food in peace? I try to remind myself that at least I have my family around me. It鈥檚 not the worst thing in the world to be single, but sometimes, it feels like it.鈥
TAKE THE QUIZ: How Well Do You Know Ramadan?
鈥淩amadan feels lonelier than ever this year鈥
For *Ameen, 25, Ramadan used to be filled with the warmth of community, but after relocating, the loneliness has been overwhelming.
“Back in Lagos, Ramadan never felt isolating. There was always a mosque nearby, Muslim friends to break my fast with, and a sense of belonging that made everything easier. But since moving to the East, I feel so alone. My family is Christian, and even though they respect my decision to fast, they don鈥檛 really understand it. I break my fast alone, sahur is lonely, and I can鈥檛 even hear the call to prayer from any mosque because the nearest one is miles away.
I鈥檝e tried to make the best of it. I follow my Muslim friends online, join virtual Islamic discussions, and watch Ramadan lectures on YouTube, but nothing replaces the feeling of physically being part of a Muslim community. Some nights, I want to cry from how lonely it feels. I know this is supposed to be the time when I strengthen my faith, but it鈥檚 hard when I feel so disconnected. I keep telling myself that Allah sees my efforts, even if I don鈥檛 have a community around me. That鈥檚 the only thing that keeps me going.”
“Iftar at the mosque reminds me that I don鈥檛 have my own family yet”
For many, iftar at the mosque is a beautiful communal experience, but for *Imran, 39, it鈥檚 a reminder of what he doesn鈥檛 have 鈥 his own home, wife, and children to share it with.
“Every evening, I sit on the mosque floor, breaking my fast with strangers who, by now, feel like brothers. And while I love the sense of community, I can鈥檛 help but feel the absence of my own family. I see married men rushing home after to eat with their wives. I hear fathers on the phone telling their kids to behave. And here I am, wondering when it鈥檒l be my turn. I used to think I had time, but now, at 39, it鈥檚 hitting me differently.”
鈥淚 spend most of my free time at the mosque鈥
For *Fatai, 48, Ramadan used to be an intimate period filled with the chatter of his late wife and children around the dining table. But since losing his wife three years ago and sending his children off to university, the silence in his home has become deafening.
“It鈥檚 just me and the maid now, but she鈥檚 not Muslim and doesn鈥檛 even speak Yoruba fluently. So, there鈥檚 not much conversation between us. I eat suhoor and iftar alone, and sometimes, it feels like I鈥檓 fasting in isolation.
The only thing that makes it bearable is going to the mosque. There, I get to be around people, hear laughter, exchange pleasantries. It reminds me that I鈥檓 not entirely alone. But the second I step back into my house, it all comes rushing back.”
“Going to Tarawih alone makes me wish I had a praying partner”聽
For *Demola, Ramadan nights are beautiful, but they also highlight the fact that he doesn鈥檛 have a special someone to share them with.
“ is one of my favourite parts of Ramadan, but walking to and from the mosque alone makes me realise how much I crave companionship. I see couples walking hand in hand, sometimes with their kids, and it stings. Not because I鈥檓 jealous, but because I know I鈥檇 love that for myself too. Praying alone is fine, but sometimes, I just want someone to say 鈥楢meen鈥 beside me.”
If you can relate to these stories or know someone experiencing similar, here’s an article with useful and practical tips on managing .
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