We probably sound like a broken record, but here鈥檚 the tea: Valentine鈥檚 Day is just around the corner, and the lovebirds plan to step on necks this year. Think 2024 was worse? Don鈥檛 wait to find out.
Since some of us are plotting how to avoid sitting at home, crying and throwing all the different variations of 鈥淕od, when?鈥 at our creator, we鈥檝e compiled 10 places guaranteed to keep you busy, surrounded by people, and far from the sting of loneliness.
The market
Forget the cinemas; the market is the real Valentine鈥檚 hotspot. With traders yelling, 鈥淐ome and buy rice, my love!鈥 and 鈥淭omato wey fresh pass your relationship,鈥 you鈥檒l find all the excitement you need. Plus, you鈥檒l get to haggle with someone who鈥檒l call you 鈥渕y love鈥 without asking for commitment.
Your family house
This is the ultimate safe haven. While everyone else is getting fake promises of love, you鈥檒l be chilling with those who truly care about you (and your bank account). Your cousins and siblings might bill you, but it鈥檚 all genuine love.
Spend time with your creator
You can never go wrong with midweek service or a prayer meeting. There, your pastor will remind you that Jesus loves you unconditionally and that waiting on the Lord is better than a man who couldn鈥檛 do all in his power to find you before February 14.
Your single friend鈥檚 house
Two singles = zero pressure. You鈥檒l spend time doom scrolling on social media and judging couples and their gifts. 鈥淚t鈥檚 even plastic flowers. God, abeg.鈥
A work meeting
Volunteer for overtime. Not only will you avoid the love-in-the-air nonsense, but you鈥檒l also look like the most dedicated employee in the room. Who needs love when you have career goals?
Gatecrash a wedding
Yes, relationship people are extra and annoying like that, so you鈥檒l find a couple or ten getting married on Valentine鈥檚 Day. The jollof rice will distract you from the lovebirds taking endless selfies. Bonus points if the DJ plays heartbreak jams during the reception.
The ATM queue
No one鈥檚 in a romantic mood while waiting for cash. The collective frustration of Nigerians struggling with withdrawals is the perfect distraction from your lack of Valentine鈥檚 Day plans.
The barber鈥檚 shop/salon
While relationship people are getting plastic roses, you鈥檒l be getting a fresh cut or braids to remind you that you鈥檙e the prize. Your mirror will hype you more than any boo ever could.
The cinema (alone)
Sure, there will be couples, but going solo to watch a horror film ensures you鈥檙e not the only one screaming out loud. Besides, you鈥檒l also get the chance to throw popcorn at couples who want to violate the 鈥渘o intimacy鈥 rule in the cinema.
A party for single people
You know those 鈥淪ingles Mingle鈥 events that pop up around Valentine鈥檚 Day? They鈥檙e not just for desperate people, I promise. Go with an open mind, free food, and a killer outfit. Your church or estate is probably planning one already as we speak.
READ THIS TOO: How to Find The Love of Your Life Before February 14
